Lie or truth?!

Recently, i've been thinking a lot. A lot of matters popped out of my mind. Day n nite i've been thinking bout these....slowly one by one is solved, but only a matter or two left.

One of it is about myself. I tink, ive been lying to myself for a period of time. I feel like i'm hypnotizing myself to walk a way of life that would not be taken by the rational me. Am i living based on a lie? Or am i walking the right way?

Feelings have surpassed every barriers in my inner heart, it's even capable of deceiving my brains and abandon of my rationality. So, it would be absolutely hard for me wake up and to think about this matter. Only one can solve my problem and she's the only one.

But, on the same time, when i've found the way to solve my problem, i'm struggling to wake up. Mayb this fake lie is a desirable life compared to another path that may lead to darkness.

So, is it lie or truth? Should i be awake or kept in this dream life? Answers are yet to be found!